How (Not) To Make Christmas Crack, er, I Mean Crunch

Last year when the online forum I'm a member of started raving about something called "Christmas Crack" I sort of wrote it off as a bunch of half-crazy clothes-obsessed women gone mad. I mean, who takes butter, brown sugar, a bunch of saltines, a package of chocolate chips, throws them all together and calls it good?

Didn't even sound remotely appealing to me. Probably because last Christmas I was pregnant and the thought of chocolate ANYTHING was enough to send me into dry heaves.

So. Fast forward twelve months and there I am staring at the same group of women RAVING about this recipe and how they can't stop eating it - hence the name "Christmas Crack".

Some did the political correct thing and changed it to "Christmas Crunch" or "Reindeer Crunch". Personally I think "Reindeer Crunch" sounds a bit... brown. And shovely-ish.

Just my opinion.

I finally gave in and tried it once a very helpful lady posted a series of pictures on how to make this stuff. It looked so simple! And now that there's no more pregnancy hormones making me gag randomly, it actually did look good.

So without further ado, here is my version of How To Make Christmas Crack.. er, Crunch. Or maybe I'll just call them Reindeer Tooties. But I don't think Reindeer Tooties are flat. Or have sprinkles.

Oh, well. Here ya go! Call 'em whatever you want!

First, heat the oven to 400, then line a cookie sheet with raised edges with tin foil and put down a single layer of saltines (one sleeve).

Take 2 sticks of butter (hey, I never claimed these were HEALTHY) and 3/4 c. brown sugar, throw them in a pan, and heat on med/high.

Boil for 3 minutes, stirring constantly with a wire whisk.

Pour mixture over the crackers and smooth out with a spatula.

Bake for FIVE (5) MINUTES!!!

Do NOT walk away and forget them for 20 minutes.

I REPEAT: Do NOT bake these things for 20 minutes. Unless you like having your kitchen fill up with smoke.

After you've pulled them out at the appropriate 5-min. mark, they'll be all bubbly. Wait a few minutes until you can see the crackers pretty clearly, and then sprinkle your chocolate chips over the top.

Wait a few minutes more, then when they look shiny, spread all over with a butter knife.

Sprinkling all over with holiday colors is, of course, optional.
Pop in the fridge for an hour or so.

When they're completely cool, peel off the tin foil and break into pieces! Congratulations, you're done!

So far I've tried this with semi-sweet, milk chocolate, mint chocolate, and butterscotch chips. My favorite is the mint chocolate chips!

Ha-ha, my pretties! Welcome now to the world of Christmas Crack! It does seem to be frighteningly addictive! Good luck with that! Consider yourself forewarned!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday Baking!